Crusty old buggars, and buggarettes

>> Friday, January 30, 2009

Slacky is feeling much better, and thinks he's good to go. So it's off to Wanga-Vegas, for the NZ Masters games to race against other old decrepid people.

Out of retirement for a hopefully tame'ish DH course as well. Can Slacky rain glory back upon the shoulders of bushlove, only time will tell. But I do have my Sam Hill fanboi shoes, so anything can happen

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Down with the ill behaviour

>> Thursday, January 22, 2009


So a few of you sports fans will know that I got ever so slightly sick in the land of Auck.
Possibly because of chicken, we shall never really know. But indications are that I got a bad case of Camplybacta. Nasty nasty stuff, and it meant instead of racing I was at the Er in Botany getting 2 litres of fluids pumped into me via my big fat veins (the Docs love 'em).

So a week later I lined up At the welly round of the NI cup. Not 100% sure I was 100%, but I was gonna giver 'er anyway. After a last minute mission down to Burkes to fit some grippy tires due to the wetness, I lined up at the start. Took off second behind Hiskey, and felt super comfy.


Up the first climb and that UBER burglar Cabin had passed me, and him and Hiskey were taking off. I sat in at a nice quick but comfortable pace. They quickly gapped me, but I sat in 3rd, with Jase the ace and God behind me. Jase passed me up the lead up to the M'carpa Climb with a snide comment from me, cos he was pedalling far too fast. Into the new descent and it was super sketchy, and I lost the front end a bit down the ski slop[e, letting God past, followed him for a while, but I faffed the exit to plimmer park, and he gapped me. I started to realise I wasn't riding at 100% so sat into a comfy rhythm and rode thru it. Came Thru the 1st lap and apparently coach Leese, could see I was not quite there, but I was too stubborn to admit it. Kept riding, cos damn it, I was still 5th, but as the 2nd lap went on I was fading quite dramatically.

Coming up to Alexander Rd, even thru the huge amount of cheering for me, people were saying I looked like shit. I felt even worse. At that point I was hoping 6th place was going to pass me, but Simon Pope was having a picnic or something ( he said mechanical, I think he was just lazy). At the far end of the course I saw one of the most disturbing sights one could ever see, Virgil Reality mooning me. A spotty hairy arse is not what you really want to see when you feel like dying. Thankfully Simon passed me up by the rooty climb and I suffered back to the velodrome to pull out. I refused to use granny gear, but barely made it up the last climb in middle, and made a beeline for the loo's after pulling out, to lose what ever was left in my gut. Lesson learnt was to let yourself fully recover from illness. But to be honest I'd do the same again, and race on my home course, just in case I had gotten over whatever I had. I'm a dumbarse like that.

Rock on Nat Champs and the holy of holy's, Karapoti!!!!

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Warrant Of Fitness - Brokeback Belmont

>> Tuesday, January 13, 2009

In sharp contrast to the Herculean efforts of many of the team in their far reaching North Island Cup campaigns, I have only been biking once since the Makara Peak Rally 5 weeks ago. And that one ride was a casual sift with Angry C-Dawg. I have been mostly trail running to build up my strength for first time running the Tararua Mountain Race. This is a 35km run across the Tararua Mountains from the Waiarapa to Otaki Forks. The total ascent is a shanksmashing 2250m and the total descent is even longer. The organisers confidently bill it as the "Hardest mountain run in New Zealand".

First time competitors must run as a team of two. I am running with my main man (and Best Man), Sam "Rammer" Dungey, who is an original Bushlove Racer, from our entry into the Muka Muka Munter as the Bushlove Racing Team back in June '08.

The event is the same day as Karapoti, so spare us a thought as you sip your latte's after the finish, as the very strong winners of the Tararua Race complete in a little under 5 hours. We expect to take wayyyyy over 6 hours. This is a concern as 6 hours is a long time to spend standing up watch TV, let alone running.

As part of the training we gave ourselves a Warrant Of Fitness exam on Sunday, in the form of our new Brokeback Belmont route. This heads from my place at Aotea, nr Porirua, up to the Belmont Hills to meet the dress circle. Then heads south via Cannons Head and Belmont Trig, down to Koro Koro stream and back up to Stratton St via Koro Koro Dam. It then climbs Middle Ridge to re-gain the dress circle and descends the same way we came up. It has many grinding climbs and long descents and was a great outing. The views off the tops were excellent and at times we had mint views each way across to Kapiti and away to the Orongarongas.

We tapped along quite well and gained Belmont Trig in OK time. The descent to Koro stream was steep in places and the fairly poor footing meant we couldn't pull back much time. The climb back out of the valley to meet the 4WD heading down to Stratton St, was steeper than the price of cheese. We cut a Danzig ascent off our original plan and headed up Middle Ridge, which was when our shanks first started to get the good news.


Click for the Garmin GPS stats....

By the time we got off the ridges and back down to civilisation, we were pretty broken, and finished the run over budget, in a time of 3hr 51mins. A very satisfying shakedown of our abilities though. We'll knock it off in under 3hrs 30 next time.

Although its not comparable to the rigours we'll face in the Tararua event, it was a great effort and certainly makes the run sections in the Crazyman and Porirua GT that we'll be doing, seem less daunting.

So there we go, something a little different from the norm'. Thanks for reading. If you are a biker who has never really run before, give it a try. Very rewarding stuff and a totally different way to enjoy the magnificent landscape that surrounds us in Wellington. Or if you don't enjoy the idea of your kneecaps popping off on long steep descents and rolling like saucers down the hill before you, maybe give this hill running a miss.

For funsies here is a little photoset of our Sunday endeavours

View towards Mana from the valley used to gain the Dress Circle

Rammer relishes crossing the windy tops

Trotting around the Dress CircleMore trotting around the tops

Rammer motoring up the ridge to Cannon's Head

Looking South from Belmont Trig - Our high point. Looking fwd to some descent

I make Belmont Trig my bitch

Rammer runs for the arches - In his fatigued state he mistook this for a MacDonald's sign and accelerated, rattling off his order to an imaginary drive-through kiosk

The very steep ascent from the Koro Koro Valley to gain the Trig 4wd. Being late for dinner and being a little tired, mean that is the end of the pics....

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We're on a beach so why not SandBag :)

>> Monday, January 12, 2009


Seeing as I do it so well. Oh wo is me, been driving for the last 2 days to get to Auckland, its hot, I didn't sleep well last night, I have not pre ridden the course, I left my favourite teddy at home and these nappies are ridding up like nobodies business. Ok now onto reality...

Coach Lisa had me doing warmup intervals on display which felt weird but to tell the truth worked its purpose after the start. I decided on a different tactic for the start of this race and sat about a foot back from the line, this gave me the benefit of a track stand with room to move. The 5 second count down started and I got up on my pins, track stood for the final seconds and then was off... into the first corner I was in 1st place with Hiskey hot on my tail. The only time in my life he would be behind me as meters later he climbed out of the saddle and passed like I was standing still.

Riding through the crowd we entered the bush, me in 3rd place. The sand made it feel like I was ridding on marshmellows, sapping every bit of energy before the first major hill. On I pushed with Clive trailing close enough to touch. I was missing the SlackShanks to chase so I felt a little lost, but you can't rely on the big man all the time. Lap 1 and I was definitely learning as I went, Carpet Drops,Sand Pits and Undulation that seemed to go on longer than Dolly Parton's Cleveage. Beginning of lap 2 and Coach reminded me I was in 3rd place and keep it up (Oh G no preasure or anything). As added motivation I had Jacinda & Tyler (My Wife & Daughter) cheering me on, thanks girls you rock, worked a treat. The heat was now getting to the point that I could feel my skin burning (Yes Mother Outlaw I have sunscreen on!!!!). As Clive said earlier in his blog, we played catch and kiss for most of the way through the second lap, me only getting the better of him because of the long down hill section to the end (Video for the girls to come, Explicit Lycra, Parental Guidance recommended (Rated M).

The 3rd final lap and I felt like I was on a beach with none of the visual benefits... This turned into a hard race, riding most of the final lap solo and bordering on throwing in the towel (Well as close as I am ever going to get to throwing it in). Stoked with my 4th position and even more happy when I found out the podium went up to 5 Woot Wooo.

Next biggie coming up is The Nationals & Karapoti, Big Dawg time.

P.S I am writing this from a lovely little cottage that overlooks Cable Bay in The Bay Of Islands, Pic above.

P.P.S Coach I'll start training again tomorrow :o)

P.P.P.S Sunny Holiday FTW!!!!

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I need a bucket and spade

>> Saturday, January 10, 2009



Woodhill was my last time racing Masters 1 Nationals (eva) so I was pleased to be feeling pretty good in the morning, the day was as humid as the insides of Davos jean lycra and I was itching for the race to start.

From the go tiger got a great start I was running in about 6th into the first nasty bit of sand climbs, this sand saps your power like no other but was pleased I didnt need to get off and attacked the climbs well, I trailed about 5 metres behind teh tiger and could see hiskey just up ahead for the first few sections, Tony would stretch out a lead on the single track and I ran into some traffic from the U17 riders walking down the techy carpet covered descents so had to wait at the top for them to get off the only line down.
I was holding onto teh Tigers tail pretty easily and passed him on one of the first climbs, again the legs where feeling pretty good and we jostled for position a few times, we where running in 3rd possy. Into the 2nd lap Tony was about 10 seconds ahead of me but I caught him napping again on the next hill climb, but teh Tiger got his claws out and sprinted past into the next descent, I stuck with him for a bit and would always gain duing the climbs but couldnt make it stick as im too slow on the descents.
Into the 3rd lap and my lack of endurance fitness showed again, no power in the legs at all and I was passed by the guy in 4th who we thought we had left behind on the first lap, but there wasnt much I could do about it so settled in and concentrated on not letting any more postions go, I crossed the line in 5th which all things considered was pleased with (even though Ricky was back at his place puking his guts out).

Best part of all I got to stand on teh Podium as they let the first 5 up.. yay.. although I wish they had mowed the grass in front of my step as you can hardly see it..

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'Cippolini' Sharp Wins Snr Men In Vegas NI Cup!

>> Friday, January 9, 2009

Round 1 of the NI Cup XC, Vegas. This is where the shit talking and sandbagging comes to a head. Luckily I have been in the sandbaggers camp, to offset Slackshanks’ and Angry Features talking it up.

After spending a week or so sifting in Vegas after Christmas I was looking forward to getting out on the race course. I had managed to squeeze in a couple of training sessions that Cabin had set out, and leading up to the race I was feeling OK. Come race day I managed to enter, find the PNP team manager, and even went to the riders briefing. Good start. Although it had rained a wee bit the day before I didn’t think the trails would be too bad. Stiff shit, as the Stans tyres were the only ones I had brought up to Vegas with me. I got out for a warm up lap, and was pretty happy with the condition of the track. I think I missed being called up for the start, but as Senior Men was on the front row I just barged my way through and lined up next to Big Gay Al. After an eternity of sitting on the line the starters gun went and we moseyed off.
I wanted to be near the front for the start of the singletrack to make sure I didn’t get held up by anyone. I got a decent start and led into Sweet & Sour, with Hiskey on my tail and Ricky and Garth close behind (I know it was Garth cos I could hear the bike 20m away). Down Bunny Jugs and out onto Direct Road for the first time. At this point Hiskey slipped past and promptly showed me how to get up a hill. I dropped 15 seconds on him from the bottom of Direct Road to the bottom of Hot Cross. I kept him in sight through Dragon’s and Mad If U Don’t before slipping back past heading into Ball & Chain. At the start of the second lap we had a quick look around and a bit of a gasbag on the 4wd to the singletrack. We decided we’d put a wee gap on and to sit tight.

Hiskey led into the singletrack, and put 15 seconds on me by the bottom of Direct Road. This time I must have had a shit ride up Direct and Hot Cross, cos by the time I reached the intersection I was 1:15 down. Damn. I managed to hold it together through Dragon’s and Mad, before having Cam Durno get onto my wheel. I didn’t know which class he was in, so let him into the singletrack first. I stuck to him, fairly well, but made a wee mistake and he ended up with a 20 second advantage for the final assault on Direct Road. Some of this training stuff must be paying off, cos not only did I manage to close the gap down, but I ended up with a 10 second lead heading into HXB for the final time. Cool.


Down thurr, and into Dragon’s I could hear Cam on my tail, and with the rain falling the trails started to get a little more exciting for me. Cam got through about halfway down Dragon’s, and tried to gap me. I stuck to him like shit on a blanket. Out of Dragon’s and into Mad, there would have been about 3 seconds between us. He pulled a wee gap at the start of Mad where the trail is quite rough, but I managed to peg him and slowly get back on his wheel. As we exited Mad I very nearly passed him, but thought I’d sit in and wait a bit. Through Ball & Chain for the last time I sat there, patiently waiting.

As we approached the finish straight we caught a slower rider, which halted our progress for a few seconds. As soon as we made the left turn into the straight I saw Cam get out of the saddle and get his sprint on. I’ll have none of that thankyouverymush. All this fashion biking must be paying off, cos I jumped up and smashed it. I ended up winning by about 1 wheel length according to a few spectators, although the results say 2 seconds.

Lots of smiles after the finish all round – I was really stoked to have had such a tough and close race. High points for me were leading after the first lap, the catch and pass on the third lap on Direct Road, and the awesome sprint finish.Low points were my Direct Road/HXB section on the second lap.

Biggie ups to Slacky for his 2nd in Old Maings, Whacko Jacko for 4th in his first ever race in Seniors(!), and solid stuff (lol) from AC and Tiger.

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Vegas NI's & Some Sweet Single Track

>> Wednesday, January 7, 2009


Teh Family wagon was packed to the hilt and we were on the road. Driving up with My Mechanic (Jamie) & Hisket (Nita Hiscock)in the car I had mondo company to keep the driving exciting. So off we trundle with surprisingly little traffic on the road. Just before Taupo I passed Teh Big Yellow Burkes Ghey trailer bursting with Bennett goodies, stopped in for a quick chat to see Angry scoffing down the last of his Latte NGAL (Not Ghey At All).

Arrived in Vegas in time to do some pre-riding of the course with some of the greats, Gav-atron & Slackboy. We cruised the course with SlackBoy passing out tips along the way (Tanks mate, much appreciated). To my surprise this course rocked, I loved the smooth rolling single track and great scenery (Following SlackyBoy of course). A quiet inside tip here folks, I think the calves have shrunk
a little from some serious training on Teh SlackGod ;o) (No that that slowed him down on the weekend...)

Getting a good second pre-ride of the course I was relaxed and happy in the thought, I knew what I was doing. Angry was right though, we did smash a little too hard in the pre-ride for the next day’s event.

It was race day and I was geared up in my slick new Rocket Kit and Merida Bike (Nice race kit guys, it looks great and is comfortable to ride in). The gun went off and away I raced like a robber’s dog. My secret weapon was in place, I had my family standing by to shout abuse and encouragement (Tanks to Teh Ma, Pa, Bro & Co.). Up the first hill and I felt good. Managed to hold on to the front end of the field going into Sweet & Sour thinking to myself "I'm in a good position, now stay relaxed" easier said than done. The single track flowed well but unfortunately so did the rest of the field. Turning out onto the 4WD track of the first big uphill Angry spanked my ass and created an 80m gap. Felling like I was carrying a dwarf on my back I struggle to the top of the hill.

A little dejected I dumped the dwarf (No dwarfs we harmed in the making of this blog) and opened up the taps on the downhill. Much to my surprise the Merida Beast took the reins and descended like Phar lap on speed, soaking up the bumps and spitting out the corners. Catching Angry before the start of the second lap I was feeling good, UNTIL!!! Teh Angry cruised past again at the beginning of lap two, I thought that was it, he had come back for blood and I was the sacrificial lamb'. To my surprise he eased up enough for me to pass. It was now or never, if I don't take my chance I will never live it down. So away I went giving it everything to put some distance between myself and Teh Angry. It worked!!! I managed to hold him off to the top of the hill and make ground on the down hill. For the rest of the race I concentrated on keeping the pins turning, through to the finish of my cheering family and smiles all around. Stoked with the 6th place, now it’s time to concentrate on round 2 in Woodhill.

Lesson learned - New Slurpie bottles come pre sealed!!! Starting into the second lap I pulled out my Leppin slurpie and went for a swig, surprised to find out these things have a seal inside them when first brought Bugger! So after splashing half of it across my bars I finally got a taste and away I went.

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Too Much Bushlove...

>> Tuesday, January 6, 2009


Having borrowed the bright yellow Burke's (Bushlove) trailer we slammed it full of bike and camping gear and headed to the redwoods. After arriving on the Thursday and setting up camp I went for a quick ride in the woods, not knowing the forest at all I decided to do a couple of laps of the 2008 moonride course and smashed up big time on a gravel road downhill... durrr....

Anyway... moving on, went for a pre-ride with teh tiger and slacky on the friday and as with all riding with the teh his passive competitive nature came out and we smashed it for a while, all the time my head was saying slow up bad boy you got a race tomorrow..


Anyway... moving on, race day loomed, arrived at the course and was pleased to find I was the oldest masters 1 racer which was an excellent sandbag.
RACE Starts.. up the first 4x4 road I was cutting through the traffic (I was seeded pretty much last behind tiger). Had teh tiger, slacky and hiskey just up ahead into sweet and sour, I was feeling a bit disappointed as my legs where already feeling tired.. hmm.. no good. Tiger must have been feeling the same as it wasnt long before I was calling to pass just before the first downhill, but he pleaded with me to go down first and we know how much teh tiger likes going down so I let him and he pulled out a wee lead downhill, im still far too slow on the singletrack.

Out onto direct road Tones was about 50m ahead, but I closed up pretty quick and opened up a nice lead upto the summit and managed to hold it pretty much till the bottom before he passed me again. Into the 2nd lap I overtook tones again before he took the lead into sweet and sour, then my legs left me and it was all over for Angry, cruised the 2nd half of the race until I spotted Wacko about 100m back around a few corners, now I wasn't going to let some young punter beat me so had to dig a wee bit deeper into what little was left and finished in 8th just ahead of Whacko..

Gonna rest up a bit before woodhill..

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Welly takes the Vets - Next the world

>> Monday, January 5, 2009


Twas the several nights after Christmas, and all through the bush, Love was being spread.........

Ahh Vegas, the one city in New Zealand where my protein based diet doesn't cause as many issues, what with the ever so fragrant air already present. Mmmmm Farty farts. I love coming to race in Vegas, Mint tracks, warm weather, sweet tracks, and the siftage.
Big Gav, Lisa, Raerae and me packed the Burkes lovebus to the gunnels with bikes and food, and a few clothes, and headed up country from windy welly, to smelly Vegas. Our plan.......to smash the 1st round of the NI Cup.


The race for me was quite good. Lining up on the line and getting called up second behind Hiskey in teh vets, and just in front of that SS freak Garth was nice. There was Mono in the senior wave just ahead of me and a bunch of other young bucks, even including Bi-One Scott the downhiller. Angry and Tony Teo were in the line behind me in a position that they would quickly become accustomed to. The start gun barked out it's smokey blank bang, and we were off. And even tho we were already smelly, we started to race as well. Very quickly the field fell into place, with Hiskey, TeH Mono, Simon and myself out the front. I was conscious of distancing Garth in the faster parts of the course, cos I knew that he is so so so quick on the singletrack here in vegas. Up Direct Rd the first time and Hiskey started to stretch out from Mono, and him from Simon, and simon from me. Up into Hot X Buns, and I rode down the hill like a nancy boy, having a muzza of a time. Letting Garth catch me cos I felt sorry for him only having 1 gear (honest injun). We both dived into Dragonstail right behind Simon, with Garth sneaking by after a while. He stretched out from Simon and me, and I snuck past Simon coming down the fireroad to Mad if you dont, with my bigger gear and bigger wheels. Into the second lap and I gallantly gave Simon a drink from my bottle cos he had lost his. Garth was up in the distance ahead and we slowly but surely closed the gap down to him on Nice Rd. We caught him just before sweet n sour, but let him in ahead of us, cos he was obviously faster thru the singletrack than us both. However he appeared to have blown his cookie a bit, cos he wasn't able to gap us at all, and up Direct Rd he was definitely suffering. Well more than we were anyway. Simon pulled out a gap on me again up the road (filthy roadie) and I got past Garth not too far before the turnoff. Decided that I needed to pull my thumb outa my ass down teh hill this time and was stoked to not have Garth catch me at all. Went thru dragons trail with a mission to track down Simon. Was on his tail coming thru for the final lap, and apart from Garth getting close thru dragons and mad if you don't, he never got back on, and once we hit the fast stuff, I knew we'd have him with his wee widdle gear. Simon stretched out a small gap whilst I feed myself, and had maybe 80 meters of so heading into sweet n sour. I slowly closed up the gap to him in there, and back out onto the road and up the climb, I knew that I couldn't let him stretch the gap anymore up the climb. I knew he was starting to hurt, but, well who wasn't. I didn't manage to close the gap, but it stayed about the same, and I closed up the gap quite a bit down the hill again. Firing along the road into Dragons I had to put the hell sprint in to get in ahead of a rider from another class which I just managed to sneak in (cheers). I quickly closed up the gap to him and stuck on his tail. I faffed up a corner just before the track and had to chase him hard to close back up, cos my plan was to snake him before mad if you don't. So I opened up the calves of doom and let rip. Came in a bit hot and went a bit wide and sloppy, but I was ahead at least. Sorta sat up a wee bit thru mad if you don't, as I knew that he wouldn't be able to pass me, and it would come down the last the open bit of road. Came out of the track and just ripped the dog and dropped the hammer. Thankfully I opened up a gap, and was able to maintain it to the finish. I was banking on him being more shattered than I was, and if he had stuck with me, it might have been a different story. But all's well that ends well.

Only 3:08 behind hiskey in teh end, so pretty darn happy about that. Rode to my limit so well stoked with that also. Coach Lisa's diet of pain must be working.
The Bushlove call went out loud and proud, to looks of utter confuzzlement from non wellingtonians.
Mad props to Raerae for a 2nd also, Hiskey for trouncing us once again, Simon Pope for a damn awesome race, Nicole Swain for having a storming race to 3rd in elite, and Lisa for seeing off those young punks in the last few laps, and riding stronger and stronger (musta been all the yelling)

And get well notes to Clinton who mashed his leg well and truly and got to feel the loving embrace of morphine. And Edwin Crossling who found out that his face and shoulder ARE NOT good brakes whilst practising the Mt Vic track. Turn right Ed, turn right!!!!!!

Angry and Tony Teo will be under going motivational clinics run by the good doctor Slacky so that they don't perform as dismally again. These clinics consist of whips, chains, large implements and paddling pools full of green jello.

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Custom Titus Fireline Singlespeed

>> Friday, January 2, 2009


Been a bit slack posting on the blog so avoid getting kicked off I'll tell you about my newish ss.

I started riding ss about about 2 years ago to avoid having to wash my bikes over winter but the bug bit pretty hard. In that time Ive had a decent stable of singlespeeds including the retro kona lavadome, voodoo wanga, curto 29er, ill-fated Scott scale and the now deceased Giant xtc. I almost never ride geared bikes anymore (My new anthem I got in Nov sits much to my wife's disgust in pieces in the laundry having only been ridden less than 1 hour) and rarely even race a geared bike.

Those who love the ss know there ain't no bling like ss bling so the hunt began for my ultimate singlespeed. After hours of research and much drooling I settled on a Titus Fireline which conveniently Jeff at Kiwibikes had started bringing into the country. Due to my lanky proportions and refined tastes I decided to go the custom route. I based the geo largely on my much loved Giant xtc with the exception of a much lower standover. Somewhat nervously seeing I'd never seen or ridden the bike I laid down my deposit and waited (and waited and for good measure waited some more).

Finally the day arrived when a lovely bike box arrived at my door and I wasn't disappointed. The welds were as nice as I've seen and overall I was a happy lad. I particularly like the simplicity of the slotted dropout which in my experience seemed like the lightest, simplest and overall best way of tensioning a ss chain. The frame came in at a respectable 3.22 pounds of titanium goodness.

Now that I've had the bike a few months and have done plenty of mileage on it how do I rate it? I really couldn't be happier with it. I won't claim the titanium gives it any magical properties but it is plenty light, looks good and most importantly is nice and stiff. Even under my lardy frame I can't get any flex from the rear end. From the first ride it felt natural (no doubt due to the familiar geo) and I'd wager is slightly faster than my previous ss's. Most importantly I've set a new record of not scheming over a new ss to replace it yet.

Thanks to Jeff at Kiwibikes for the frame and Jonty at Revolutions for building it up.

Spec list.
Titus Fireline frame
Rock Shox sids
Hope pro II /Stans Olympic wheels
White Industry cranks
XTR brakes
Thomson post/stem
Answer carbon bars
Ezigrip Racer edge grips

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The Bushlove Team are members of the fabulous Welington club

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